I often joke about particular events happening in my life that did not feature on my vision board for the year, and this month was one of those events. Surgery! To be more precise I had minor oral surgery, it was planned in order to remove a lump in my mouth. I am really pleased that it went so smoothly, but the
process has not been easy. You may wonder why I would share something so personal, and in some incidences, privacy is important but so is authenticity.
As a coach, speaker and trainer I am often at the front of rooms and on stages and also on virtual stages. It can be so easy for other people to look on and assume it comes effortlessly, but sometimes there are challenges and issues that we have to overcome. As such I value the impact that sharing the highs, lows and realities of life as a professional can have. So, as I am back at work and mostly recovered, I wanted to share some reflections from having surgery, that might just be a helpful reminder to you.
When I was speaking with the consultant about when to plan the surgery, I did consider what I had on in my diary but definitely underestimated how long the recovery would take. And so I found myself fulfilling commitments just a few days after surgery, thankfully it went well … but I was still adjusting to the changes and felt there was not as much fluidity in my speech as usual. Planning for recovery and rest is vital, especially when we are driven because light work duties rarely exist in our world.
I have to confess I am so much more comfortable helping than being the one to need help. For various reasons, my immediate family were unable to attend my surgery appointment with me, which I understood and accepted. I was more than prepared to go alone, but then a friend offered to pick me up and accompany me. This was a relatively new friend, and I was surprised but also realised that support can come from unlikely sources. No matter who we are, at times we all need to accept practical help graciously. It turned out really well, because they were very comfortable by hospital environments and really helped calm my nerves.
Patience is often described as a virtue. I like to think that I am a fairly patient person, but the days following surgery when I was having to drink Weetabix, the consistency you would give a 6-month-old, proved otherwise. The stitches were uncomfortable and I was so ready to get back to normal. The reality is that it takes time to adjust to change, feelings of frustration do not that change the process. As such to practice patience is the best option.
There were a few other things I was reminded of during this ‘surgery season’ but what has been most
important both before it and during was remembering my purpose. Retaining a positive attitude and focusing on the areas I am called to has been really motivational. Whilst I appreciate there are some tough things we navigate where we have no other choice but to pause, sometimes we can find strength from continuing. I have definitely developed resilience over the last year from facing discomfort to feeling paranoid about the visibility of the lump or facing people’s comments. I am really delighted and very grateful that everything has now been sorted, and looking forward to what lies ahead in my professional journey.
Francesca McDowall, September 2024